Flyers vs Pens for the division? Groovy baby! (Courtesy: solarnavigator.net)

Put The Grrr In Swinger Baby, Yeah!


Turn off your fembots, pour some Captain Morgan into your TaB, and get ready for a big game tonight. If the Penguins win in regulation, we are tied in points. If the Flyers win, we’re up by 4. That, comrades, is a very important swing game.

International Man of Mystery: It seems like it’s been 30 years since the Flyers have played well. They’ve been shockingly bad lately, as if being cryogenically frozen. They haven’t beaten a playoff team since February 20th. Luckily, tonight Dr. Crosby-Evil and his son, Malkin-Evil are still out. We still have to deal with Random Task-Fleuryand a bunch of other bums that have pistols in their jumbleys. The Flyersneed to bring more mojo than they did the last time these teams met.

The Spy Who Shagged Me: The biggest piece of the puzzle will be Mini Me Staal. He’s not as good as his brother, nor is he as talented as the Evils, but right now, he’s the most important forward on PittsburghMike Richards has to get up in his face and not let him get things going. Pitt wins by defense now, and if we limit this guy, we can pretty much keep them out of our zone too. Sure, they got guys that can finish, but not many that can create. We’ve always got Fast Bastard Letang to deal with too (more emphasis on the bastard part).  That mofo always jumps up on offense, and he’s really turned into on of the premier offensive defenseman in the game.

Goldmember: Tonight, we can’t let Nigel Powers Laviolette down. We have to go back in time, and get back to how we were playing 2 months ago. That Flyers team would have no problem doing a number 2 on anyone. It’s not like we’ve physically lost something that has made us look like crap lately. It’s completely mental. The team has to want this game. If they show some determination, it doesn’t matter if this game is played in the ‘Burgh, Philly or Happy Valley, the Orange and Black would come out on top. And given the implications this game has on the standings, I think the Flyers will come out full force tonight.

Here’s a view from the other side on Pen’s Labyrinth.

Thanks for reading, baby!

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Tags: Austin Powers Dr. Evil Evgeni Malkin Fat Bastard Goldmember Happy Valley International Man Of Mystery Jordan Staal Kris Letang Marc-Andre Fleury Mike Myers Mike Richards Mine Me Nigel Powers Penn State Peter Laviolette Philadelphia Flyers Pittsburgh Penguins Scott Evil Sidney Crosby The Spy Who Shagged Me