Evgeni Malkin
Evgeni Malkin-stein is my most hated Penguin. Seeing his oafy, mouth-breathing face speaks for itself, but the real reason for my hate is that Malkin is a weasel.
What I mean by that is that when Malkin is challenged with hard but clean physical play, or even just losing fair and square, his typical recourse is a cheap shot. Sometimes it’s a slewfoot, sometimes it’s an opportunistic headshot, sometimes it’s a blind-side headshot after the puck has gone (1, 2), sometimes it’s an elbow, sometimes it’s a slash, sometimes it’s a board, or sometimes it’s simply chasing players around the ice looking to deliver a blatant cheap shot. Whatever garbage Malkin pulls, it’s always from behind and after the puck is gone. That’s the epitome of being a weasel.
The fact that Malkin doesn’t have the reputation for this stuff makes it all the more infuriating. It’s like I’m taking crazy pills whenever it happens. Instead, what happens is things like Malkin avoiding a key suspension despite a cut-and-dry rule mandating a suspension.
It does give me some reassurance that there exists on youtube a playlist called “Malkin scumbag.” That sounds about right.